Mainichi mom - from zerochan.netTo put it wisely as my friend did:

"...To do justice by whatever it is to which you have committed your time and attention, the idea is that you have to work on it, intensely, every day.

"And that is what it takes to be a good parent: mainichi."

To our dismay, the Sponge Thief would rather steals sponges than to show up every day - but it takes years before we realize that this is the best thing that could ever happen to us. The farther in the distance my Sponge Thief fades, the better off we all are...


Sponge Thief Sighted at a Silent Auction

He looked like Sam Shepard, with glasses and broken shouldersI was at a small silent auction benefit for Alzheimer’s Disease, trying to decide whether $40 was too much to bid on a batch of home brew, when a handsome man, about my age, with dimples and round gold wire-framed glasses, came up to me, smiling.

“Oh,” he said, “I thought you were someone else. You have the same shoulders.”

“I didn’t know shoulders were that distinctive?”

“Yes well, they are.”

“I see,” I said, and since he didn’t go away, and I don’t know how to end conversations, I continued, “And how did you find out about this benefit?”

“My wife’s friend at work invited us, he’s over there.” He pointed. 

“And what does she do?”


“Oh, do you do that as well?”

“No. I was an engineer, but that didn’t work out, so now I’m a stay-at-home husband/cabinet maker of sorts.”

“You mean you’re freelance.”

“No, actually, I don’t make cabinets anymore, because I destroyed both shoulders making cabinets.”

“I see, that’s why you notice shoulders.”

He nodded and continued,”You know, when you get older, everything gets all screwed up.”

“Don’t I know it,” I said.

“No, you don’t,” and he paused, looking hard at my face, “I’m about 12-15 years older than you, and believe me, when you screw things up with your body, it doesn’t really improve.”

“I’m 46.”

“Wow! I thought you were in your 30s. You have a great hairdresser. Really, you should tell them they’re doing a great job.”

His poor wife came up to us at that point and glared at me suspiciously as if to say, why are you hitting on my husband and I smiled back at her wishing I could shake her very hard while I shouted, He’s a sponge thief! Run away as fast as you can!    


Sneaking Suspicion

yikesI have the sneaking suspicion that Romantic Love, the concept, served a purpose when women were chattel and could not choose their mate and couldn't work or inherit money, etc, (new idea at that time: you can choose to marry who you want, technically!!) but that it is not helpful long-term unless you are some kind of evolved wunderkind who isn't attracted to the person who embodies all the stuff about yourself you don't want to look at, or wish you were.  


I have the sneaking suspicion that romantic loves means the god in you falls in love with the god in the other person.  If so, watch out for the gods! No wonder it is a mess in prosaic fell in love with a god and you expect him to change diapers? That's hilarious.
What the God in Him Actually Looks Like. yikes.


The Victorian novels dealing with this...I read them over and over & watch the BBC shows, trying to learn, while loving it every minute WHY?, but they always end without revealing whether it was the right choice after all, to marry for love.  Getting married, those novelists consider that the logical end.  And then what??  


Clearly someone needs to write sequels to all these novels, I think it is the only thing that will quell my fascination. Is it simply the most amazing propaganda campaign ever? Propaganda for what?


Films Worth Watching

Castaway on the Moon

Imaginative and beautiful film about being stuck, and how it is still possible to change even though you can't change unless you think you're going to die otherwise.  And it's Korean! Kam sah han mi dah! Pass the banchan! Where's the bak sae ju? Another Hite, asap! Dreaming of my next Korean BBQ dinner with T. Halophile...

Transformation never was so eccentric and awesome. Dude talks to a scarecrow instead of a Wilson soccer ball...and the other main character with serious PTSD needs to take out the trash and be nicer to her mom! sheesh.

My kids and I were slayed by this film. A Must See! 


Mary and Max

I couldn't sleep one night, serious insomnia - and so in desperation, I watched this on Netflix. Although best watched between the hours of 2 and 3:30am,  if you'd rather sleep during that period, you can still watch it at a reasonable hour - you will still thoroughly enjoy it. I guarantee it! If you don't enjoy it, let me know and I will send you chocolate covered ants in the mail! From Australia!

Babies come from pints of lager! and other little known facts are revealed in this beautiful and complex claymation film about an unlikely pen-pal friendship between an Australian girl and a middle-aged New Yorker, each challenged by tough environments and their own capacity - in different ways.  


Troubled Water

Oh I loved this movie so.. It basically examines redemption and forgiveness... The viewer must make up his own mind about the main character, is he good or bad? The ambiguity creates suspense better than any fast cutting or jerky camerawork. Let's hear it for storycraft triumphing over special effects to create pathos! and I loved the ending, which is not tidy, so deal with it, you Americans who need it all wrapped in a bow.


Fred Astaire is asking Ginger Rodgers to dance; he’s asking you to dance. 

Watch Fred Astaire, watch him twinkle, precisely.  Turning, bowing, welcoming: every step synchronized, artful, every gesture exact.  Smoothly navigating the turbulence of boa, then tulle, now satin gusts from her dress, they hold hands sideways, then backwards. Now they face each other, just for a moment:  all is in alignment, all one. Then they’re off, gliding lightly, effortlessly.  When Fred Astaire died, the world lost grace.

What Happened To

Saudi Arabia is the only country in the world that prevents women from driving.

Good job Saudi Arabia!  

We became aware of womens rights issues in Saudi Arabia quite late in the game but through an effective and well-designed campaign via Alas this website has now been co-opted and is just about car parts or something? Nothing about women's rights. 

It's creepy. 

Still, lest we forget, women were trying to forge a campaign to be lawfully allowed to drive in Saudi Arabia by O The Horror, driving as protest. 

I can't imagine what this must be like, not being able to drive? To have to rely on your husband to drive you - and what if he is really Our ExHusband - then you will not be driven anywhere, my friend, and you will have to pay a driver? Just so you can get some damn milk for your coffee? 

Check it out though - Chicas Senators sent a letter to the King of This Asshole Country!  But why only the ladies? I heave a great sigh.